Monika and Günter

My weekend should be quite interesting and different. My future parents-in-law are in town and staying at my house until Monday. As they have never been in Madrid before, sightseeing is mostly on the program, the obvious shopping, tapas stops, and of course nice dinners celebrating M's birthday over and over. Also in the agenda, many pre and post dinner cocktails, hopefully followed by some dancing once they are a bit blau (i.e. tipsy in German.) Because one thing is for sure: my parents in law are hilarious when tipsy. In last night's preview, they offered me the 'du' (i.e. tu in Spanish and French) and I no longer have to call them Mr and Mrs S, but Monika and Günter. A HUGE step! Let's see what other big steps will occur this promising weekend.

Welcome to my club

Happy Birthday Love

and welcome to the 30s club!

One drop

The situation in Madrid and most of Spain is critical. The Madrid dams are at 37% of their capacity and if it does not rain soon, water will become a rare necessity. Incredibly, there are very few restrictions. The campaign Súmate al reto del agua (i.e. join the water challenge) is pretty much everywhere since the beginning of Summer, clearly stating the problem and giving tips on how to spare water. Easy tricks, that each and everyone of us should be doing everywhere and always - these should actually be innate behavior - but that are very rarely followed, even in this critical present situation. As easy as turning the water off while you're brushing your teeth, or better even, using a glass filled with water. Taking a quick shower instead of a bath. Etc, etc.

Anyway, this is just one drop of The BIG Problem. The general, critical and complete lack of respect for our planet. It is simply frustrating to see how the majority of people around the world behave selfishly, unconscious (or is it unsensible?) about the effects of their actions on the earth, the sky, the air, the water, and the generations to follow.

So I can't help but wonder, is it really a simple lack of education?

Which Bettie Page are you?

You're Leggy Bettie...you may be tall or short but either way you seem to make the guys swoon and the girls jealous and girls think of you as a "slut" or "bitch". Again, you're beautiful, they're not...right?

And you?

Nothing is forever

I have always known that nothing is forever. My expectations were always low, as I thought it was the best way to not get disappointed and hurt. I never thought and therefore hoped to spend my entire life with the same man. I remember shocking all my friends and boys who liked me during my late teenage years, when during those late night talks after the club had closed and we all found ourselves at somebody's house where the parents were absent, we all talked about how we saw our lives when we'd be 30. After they all had described their picture perfect future -which basically consisted on mariage, children, a big house in the suburbs and a dog running in the garden- they all were dumbfounded and speechless when I finished telling them that what I wanted was to have a daughter and raise her on my own. Followed the obvious questions wanting to understand why I thought that way, and the usual attempts to change my position on the issue.

My point of view changed with the years, and in my mid twenties I started to wish I'd find that special someone with whom I'd have a family and attempt to make it work for as long as possible. Mariage was not on the program even then. I still did not believe in it, at least not for me. Maybe because none of the guys I was with ever made me feel completely and utterly safe or that he was worthy of my blind trust.

All this changed when I met M. As naive as it may sound, I really feel like he's The One for me. Suddenly I want the picture perfect illustration I so vividly reprobated (ok, without the house, garden and dog.) And I will go for it if given the chance, and do my best to make it work for as long as possible. But I will never take it as granted and expected it to last forever. Because nothing is forever. And whenever I seem to be forgetting this verity, I get a reality check. In this case, my dear friend K was dumped by the man she loves and with whom she was finally ready to attempt the 'as long as possible.' It happened to her today, and it can happen to any of us any day, any time, so let's just be aware of that fact.

Healthy again

I was sick at home for the past three days. I am finally feeling good again. So I am finally out of my house but unfortunately in the office.

What type of killer are you?

You kill for revenge.
That is because you have lost something or someone you held very dear. Now you can't seem to get over the loss that marked your soul, and the only solution is to go after the one person who brought all this pain to you. Chances are you are angry inside and you bottle everything up and don't talk to anyone about it. People may want to help, but you think that they can never understand your pain and only get frustrated because of this. But it is important to see all that you have left and be thankful of that even if you have lost something great. It may not be true that Times heals all wounds, but with time and talking about your feelings, maybe the hurt will ease.
Main weapon: Yourself
Quote: "You can close your eyes to reality but not to memories" -Stainslaw J. Lec
Facial expression: Gritted teeth and teary eyes

What Type of Killer Are YOU?

A productive not working day

Other than my computer crashing, today is actually a good day. A surprisingly productive one, as a matter of fact. As all my co-workers are out of the office and a wonderful peaceful silence reigns in the open space, as I have no access to my digital files and restricted access to my outlook, but yet full access to my absent co-worker’s computer and Internet, I have thus been able to spend my day not working, and taking care of many pending personal matters. I have been able to finally:
a) send to print some digital photos,
b) surf the blogs I like and discover new ones,
c) and most importantly I have booked M’s and my free business class tickets to Miami (yes, you read that right, your eyes are not playing tricks on you.) It’s confirmed, we are coming and in style! We’ll be there from October 7th to the 16th so mark your calendars and let me know when and where you want to meet =)
d) publish two posts in one day

I don't give a rat's ass

I cannot say that I did not expect it to happen. I really did, since the very first day I inherited it from my colleague. It had been passed on and on, from co-worker to co-worker, its memory and space decreasing slowly, its system slowing down dangerously. No matter how much space I freed, junk I deleted, and TLC I offered, it was not getting better. So it really should not have been a surprise this morning when, ten minutes into my work, the screen of my laptop turned black and any key I pressed made a high-pitched scary beeping sound.

But it was. No matter how much you expect some things to happen, they often come as a shock when they finally do occur. On the bright side, as I really do not believe that our lousy IT department will be able to save/repair it, this incident might finally get me the new laptop I was promised 18 months ago (which should leave me approx. 2 weeks with no access to my computer, i.e. no way to work.) On the realistic side, I will probably inherit an old laptop from someone who will indeed get a brand new one, supposedly deserving it more that myself, even if they NEVER travel. The truth is, when your company knows that you are looking elsewhere and will thus leave soon, you’re pretty much f***ed when it comes to new and interesting projects and equipment. Now ask me if I had backed up all the reports, stats, and files? The answer is no, and I don’t give a rat’s ass!

Two

It's been 2 years today. Two years since M and I have been together. Two years of laughs, tears, surprises, trips, but most of all two years of love, caring, and companionship. I can honestly say that we evolved together, in the same direction, and that we are closer now than we ever were. Many would say (and have done so) that living apart as we do makes things easier. I could not disagree more. It might have made things easier in the beginning, as we were slowly building up our relationship and learning to be together. But at some point it started making things much harder. It's hard to let him leave when all I want is to spend every minute with him. It's hard to only be able to hear his voice on the phone, when all I want is to feel his arms around me. Harder not to be able to hug him when he's feeling low. Not to mention how expensive it all is, between the monthly flights and the phone bills. I reckon that when we are able to surpass the numerous obstacles of living apart, we will really appreciate every moment, every detail, when we finally do live together. HopefullyDefinitely soon...

A long time ago, while I was visiting New Orleans, an old gipsy woman read my palm and told me about M. Up to this date, everything she told me came true. But that's another post ;-)

Happy Anniversary Love!

Yaya

On Saturday, my grandmother is turning 85. So today I am jumping in a plane to the South of Spain, as for this very special occasion the three generations of mothers and daughters will spend a few days together in Rancho Chico. Yaya, my mother and I.

I have always said that my grandmother's life was fascinating and deserved to become a book... For lack of book, here’s a small summary: Yaya, which stands for grandmother in Russian, was born in 1920 in Ukraine. After her father's murder by the Bolsheviks, she had to flee the country with her mother and together they went to Switzerland. Her mother died a few years later, when my grandmother was 8 years old, but she had by then remarried and thus left her in the hands of a stepfather and his family. All in all she had a tough childhood. Not an easy life either. She worked very hard her entire life, went though a divorce with her first husband, raised her daughter alone, and was immensely deceived by her second husband, who additionally left her bankrupted. At the end, she buried both of her husbands, and my mother and I are everything she has left. She now lives alone in her flat, and suffers from an eye disease which is making her close to blind.

Yaya is a beautiful, fragile, and overly generous woman, suffering from many pains (all mentally generated if you ask me), who (as many old people tend to do) is slowly growing back into a child... So this long weekend is pretty much about babysitting ;-)

Maybe soon

Remember that saying: 'Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans'? Well that's pretty much what's happening right now, as last night, out of the blue, a trip to Miami was offered to me. So, boys and girls, I might be coming to see some of you very soon, but as nothing is confirmed yet I'd better not say more ;-)

Not what I expected

I was expecting the announced rainbow but instead I got a work overload... no time for blogging these days =(

Predictions

I cannot say that I believe in horoscopes and their predictions, but I can say that reading a positive forecast does make me feel good, even if momentarily. And so I am glad to read what September has in store for me according to Elle.com

'You’ve certainly paid your dues and done penance professionally and personally. Because of your generally optimistic attitude, most people have no idea how much you’ve given up or sacrificed for someone or something you believe in. Thankfully, the rainbow you’ve been hoping for makes an impressive appearance this month. . . '

Rainbow, come to me at last!!! ;-)

Dilemma

I got a call yesterday. Today I got an offer. A very tempting one, even if it is not exactly perfect. The pros are the field (film/TV production), the location (Geneva), the company, the position, and the starting date (end of September.) Unfortunately there are cons as well, such as the fact that it is a half-time job (20 hours/week) with a salary accordingly, and the location since it might be harder for M to find a job.

Production has always been my passion and being able to work in that industry would be a dream come true. But how much am I willing to sacrifice to follow my passion? I think I need to go to this interview to find out.