New blog?

It's been 5 years since my last post. Just as I was thinking about starting a new blog today, I stumbled upon Lovely Planète. The idea was to start writing and sharing about natural health and cleaning solutions in a new place. But why not simply continue that here? I will let that idea sink in for a while...

Foods that cause colics

I breastfed my daughter and I am now breastfeeding my son. My daughter had colics for the first 3 months and this time around I put everything on my side to avoid my son having them. And it starts with what you eat. If you avoid these foods during the first 8 weeks, while the digestive system of the newborn develops, you're putting good chances on your side... My son is 8 weeks today and no colics till this day =D

Foods to avoid for the first 6-8 weeks:

Fruits Vegetables Miscellaneous Mangoes Berries Melons Grapes Oranges Lemons Stone fruits Pineapple Strawberries Broccoli Cabbage Brussel sprouts Peas Cucumber Capsicum Lettuce Tomato Radishes Cauliflower Lentils onion Strong herbs and spices. (Cayenne, chili, oregano, thyme, marjoram, sage, rosemary) Brewers yeast Tea Alcohol

A true nightmare or what a birth should not be

I gave birth to my son Nicolas on June 13th. What should have been an easy and beautiful birth became a nightmare the minute I requested an epidural. It was 2am and a sleepy nurse missed it three times, one of them releasing liquid from my spine. She truly did not have a clue what she was doing as the pain from the contractions came back every 90 minutes and she had to give me more painkillers each time. Had I known this I would have certainly skipped the epidural as I experienced most of the pain from the contractions and had post-partum complications due to the wet spinal tap. Nicolas came out with three pushes in a matter of minutes at 12.15pm.

To make a long story short, I soon experienced unbearable spinal headaches and neck pains when sitting or standing. I was therefore told I immediately needed a blood patch. That's when a butcher anesthesiologist came and with no local anesthesia, sitting up in bed, he injected 20cc of my blood in my spine. I will never forget that pain in my life. I then had to lay flat for 24 hours, not being able to nurse or attend to my newborn baby. I left the hospital 2 days after the birth and the neck pain and headaches soon came back. My OBGYN prescribed ibuprofen against the pain and "to make sure the blood patch worked" he said, and the only thing I could do was lay flat on my back for ten days. Thank God my mother was there to help with my 3 year old daughter and my baby.

I started looking online and found a community called Brain Talk Communities.One of their forums is about spinal leaks and that's where I found out more about what they had done to me and how a blood patch should a. have been done with local anesthesia, laying down on my stomach and therefore be painless b. have been done 24 hours after the birth and c. have been stopped the second it started to hurt, i.e. too much blood had been injected in my spine. That is also where I found a recommendation to see a neurologist. My OBGYN wanted me to go back and have another blood patch since the pain had not disappeared, but that I refused. I went to see the neurologist specialized in spinal problems and had to have an MRI to make sure I did not have a blood clot in my brain given that too much blood had been used during the blood patch. He also explained that I should have never taken ibuprofen against the pain as it is an anti-inflammatory and the purpose of the blood patch is to cause an inflammation in the spine so that the leak created by the spinal tap can close itself. As a result it will now take months for my leak to close itself, if it ever does. I should not be carrying anything heavy which is obviously impossible with a 3 year old and a newborn baby. But if the pains I am still experiencing in my back and neck have not disappeared by mid/end of August, I need to go back to see Dr. Adams.

The reason why I am writing all this is because no woman should go through what I went through during a magical moment such as birth. All this happened at the Mercy Hospital in Miami. Avoid it at all costs and make sure a certified anesthesiologist performs your epidural, not a nurse. Inform yourself.

Ups and downs

Life is full of ups and downs lately. I was up yesterday when a company finally hired me for a part-time consultant job. I am down today, after going to my third prenatal testing and the doctor spoke Chinese to me announcing that our 21 week old baby might have a kidney problem. A double collecting system of the kidney. Which is apparently a possible symptom of Down.

Doctors in this country are terrible. They are so money driven. They keep telling me that I need to have an amniocentesis because I am older than 35 and the risks of having a child with down syndrome is higher. But my friend who is a doctor and specialist in prenatal medicine in Spain assured me that it has been proven long ago that there is no link between down syndrome children and the age of the mother! I refuse to have an amniocentesis unless it is completely necessary. No matter what they tell you, it is invasive for the baby. And there is always a risk involved.

These days

I have been sewing clothes for Emily and baby presents these days. Not that I have much free time on my hands, but I enjoy very much looking at the result. So I have been thinking to open a little shop on the web and make costum orders.

Gigoteuse / sleeping bag for baby

Little house I made for Emily's 2nd birthday

2 Toddler dresses

Breastfeeding

I immensely enjoyed breastfeeding my daughter. Not only did it create a special bond bewteen us, it gave me peaceful and restful moments with her each time I nursed her. I was extremely well advised from the beginning on by my midwife in Germany: she told me what to eat to increase my milk production, what to avoid to decrease it or to avoid producing gases for baby, etc. And I was stunned to notice that mothers here in the US are not given all this information. I've therefore decided to share this information here, hoping to help other mothers out there.

Herbs and foods good while breastfeeding:
fennel\fenugreek
chamomille
oatmeal
malt
anis

Herbs and food you should avoid if you want to continue breastfeeding:
sage
mint/peppermint/spearmint
parsley
garlic
alcohol (although 1 glass of wine every now and then with your meal will NOT harm your baby)
orange and grapefruit
all nuts
quinine (found in tonic water for example)
all drinks with caffeine (1 coffee a day is ok)
NO medicine unless you got the green light from your doctor

This list does not pretend to be complete. Check with your doctor for any questions or doubts!

That thing called motherhood

I have no time to achieve anything other than taking care of Baby Em these days. Not that I have had plenty of time for myself for the last nine months. But the fact is that she's slowly sleeping less and less, her naps becoming shorter and more rare, her nights becoming shorter as well, and I fear that the situation is only going to get worse. She'll start walking soon, I mean she's already standing, so very soon I'll be running after her and will have even less time for myself.

How do other mothers do it? I spend every day and every hour with her, and don't see how I could have some free time other than leaving her with someone else, such as a babysitter. And I am not quite sure that I'm ready for that step yet. Probably soon though, as I seriously need time to start doing things like emptying the last boxes, organizing the closets, getting in shape, reading a book, going back to my sewing projects, just to name a few. Besides, affording a babysitter implies starting to work again. Definitely not there yet. I have enough in my plate as it is thank you.

I often wonder how mothers of more than one child manage everything. Two mothers of nine month old babies I know are already pregnant again, and they seem extatic. One of them is pregnant with her fourth. No joke. I am by no means saying that a second child is out of the question, but definitely not so early. I wouldn't even have my 1 and 1/2 hour of "free" time per day with that scenario. Thank you but no thank you. Not for me. Not yet at least.

M. sure seems to be ready for that second baby though, considering his reaction the other day:

me: "I have good news."

M.: "Tell me."

me: "Try guessing."

M.:"Hmmmm... you're pregnant?"

No need to continue how that conversation went, right? Point proven, he's ready. But he's not the one spending 24 hours a day with Baby Em, nursing her, changing her diapers, playing with her, carrying her, getting little sleep, having no social life, and in charge of a household. I guess if I were in his shoes, I'd be ready too. Hell, I'd even consider having more than 2 children. Fathers/men have it much easier imho. Yet I wouldn't change my place with him for anything in the world. I'd miss out on that incredible magical fullfilling beautiful and undescribable thing called motherhood.

a lebanese feast

Lebanese has always been one of my favorite cuisines. I know how to cook all the wonderful mezza I love to eat thanks to the mother of S, a lebanese guy I used to date years ago. But today, I didn't need to cook to eat them all, as I bought kibbeh, tabouli, grape leaves, fatayer, labneh, and hommous from a delicious lebanese traiteur I plan to visit often! What a feast =)

Sunshine life

Sunshine life is so sweet and busy, I have better things to do than updating my blog these days. No worries, I have no doubt I'll be back soon. Till then, I'll just keep enjoying life =)

it's that time again

It's that time again! We're moving. Crossing the ocean once again. But this time around I'll qualify our move as first class, as I don't have to pack all the boxes. The moving company arrived at 7h30 this morning and is still busy packing all our belongings. Why didn't I always move like that?! Probably because I could not afford it, just as we wouldn't now, if it were not paid by M's company.

We'll be flying to Miami on Monday and moving into our new house on Tuesday. As our belongings will take between six to eight weeks to be delivered to us, we'll camp in the meantime. Although I'd qualify that camping as first class as well, since M's company is renting the basic furniture and houseware kits for us in the meantime. Anyway, camping in our beautiful house under the sun and the palm trees in a city like Miami can only be a partie de plaisir me thinks! Oh how I cannot wait to be there!

Birthday baby

Emily is six months today. It's unbelievable how fast the time went by, how much she's grown and changed in such little time. After the very hard first three months with daily colics, we really have the impression now that she was not completely with us yet - which explains why they call that the missing fourth trimester.

Emily is now another baby. She is patient, curious, playful, loves to listen to music and singing (she actually sings with) and laughs a lot. She hates to lie on her stomach, but loves to sit up to watch everything around her. Her new discovery these days is doing v and b sounds all day long.

I actually cannot believe she's only been with us for six months. It's as she'd always been here.

relationships

I don't know why maintaining good relationships is so darn hard. But I find myself having to watch what I say and what not more often than wished these days. Why can't we just be diplomatically honest to each other without hurting each other's feelings? Why are relationships so delicate? Why do we take everything so personal?

Fortunately, I just cleared a misunderstanding that had been going on for the past month with my mother yesterday. Whether I expressed myself wrong or whether she understood me wrong does not matter. The fact is it happened, with my mother, with whom I have an excellent relationship and truly thought such a misunderstanding would never occur. Maybe the fact that I want everyone I love to like each other is the cause to all my problems. After all, I also don't like everyone my loved ones love.

Success!

Our look and see trip to Miami was a success:

Emily was an angel the whole trip; she did not complain once during the 11 hour flight to Miami sitting on our lap as no baby basket was provided to us (5 babies in total on the flight!); she came along when we visited houses the entire day, eating, sleeping and looking curiously at everything with no complaint; she started sleeping nights 7 hours in a row during our trip, which is a very big improvement; she slept in her little baby basket the entire flight on the return.

The house; we found a house close to our dream house. It has everything we wanted, i.e. a bedroom for us, a bedroom for Emily, a bedroom for guests, an office, a pool. Everything is new and done with very good taste by the owner's ex husband who is an architect. We're moving in December 9th. I'm pretty sure I'll feel as if I were acting in a Hollywood movie living in such a house for two years.

We were very busy the entire trip and were unfortunately not able to relax and enjoy the wonderful Biltmore facilities or the beach, but truly, que demande de plus le peuple?

Look and see trip

We're on our look and see trip in Miami. We have one week to find our future home. One week to enjoy the fabulous hotel we're staying at. Too bad I caught a cold cause the pool is simply magnificent...

A concept worth copying

Each neighborhood in Hanover has a bookshelf such as this one somewhere, which is full of books. The concept is the following:

You can use the bookshelf anytime.

You can choose a book.

You can borrow it and bring it back.

You can keep it and replace it by another book.

When you like the book so much that you want to keep it a longer time, you can. But when it is really so good, others should also be able to read it.

When you have many books at home that you would like to bring to the bookshelf, then do so. But please only as many that fit in the bookshelf.

When something is broken, please call the following phone number xxxxxxx.

Now, is that great concept or is that an absofuckinglutely amazing concept many cities should copy?

Tia Tambo

Emily's aunt Tia Tambo came to see us for the long weekend. Although I have to admit I had my fears, as my sister is 24 years old and more importantly still in the middle of an irresponsible party-till-you-drop-with-whatever-is-needed phase, everything went extremely well and I really enjoyed spending these days with my sister. As for Emily, she immediately adopted her. She usually needs some time to be apprivoisée (i.e. tamed), but didn't this time around. She spent 4 days smiling and even laughing for the first time with her aunt. She calmed down when Tia Tambo sang and read to her. My sister is the eldest of her 8 cousins on her mother's side and that taught her to take care and entertain small kids. She proved it to me these past days. I am now looking forward to being in Miami and letting Emily spend more time with her aunt. They both love each other SO much already!

it could happen after all

I've been living in Hanover for two and half years now. Hard to believe it's been so long already. Although on the other hand it does feel like I've been here for an eternity. By all means much longer than planned. I've been pretty much feeling like lingering in a waiting room, as if my life was on hold. Leaving without M was never really an option, although I would have taken that job in Zurich if I had been given the opportunity. But things happen for a reason, and if I left my life in Madrid to live with M back in 2005, it certainly was not to find myself alone in Zurich in 2007. Life decided otherwise anyway. And I'm glad it did, as we now have a beautiful daughter. When we move, we'll move all three together. Which amazingly enough might actually happen now. The board gave the green light to M's transfer to Miami yesterday. No obstacles stand in the way to our new life any longer. Although we'll wait until the contract is signed before we open the champagne. A magnum bottle it will be!

co-sleeping

Emily has been sleeping with me since her very first night. It was not planned but just happened that way thanks to the hospital's midwife advice and my gutt feeling. Although I was completely exhausted after the birth, I just spent that first night staring at my daughter sleeping next to me. A night I will never forget.

She has been sleeping in our bed with M and I ever since then. Nevermind critics and other points of view, I have become a firm believer of all the advantages of co-sleeping. Besides, it feels right. And it will thus continue that way for now. I am however considering buying one of those co-sleeper cribs that you fix to your own bed, allowing her to be next to me, but giving her - and most importantly us as a couple - her/our own space. It certainly sounds ideal at this point, but our american bed is quite high (70cm!) and finding a european co-sleeper crib high enough seems to be a problem. My actual mission.

Life is sweet

We are finally finding some kind of rhythm. Emily has good nights, spending more than 12 hours in our bed until around 10h30 in the morning. I am not saying that she sleeps through the night, as she wakes up quite often to eat, sometimes as often as every one or two hours, but she then falls back asleep immediately. In spite of these frequent awakenings, I am starting to recuperate some sleep at last.

As soon as she's awake, Emily spoils us with wonderful smiles. The whole room lights up when she looks at us smiling. Our hearts fill with joy and they feel as if they were going to explode. I know it sounds corny, but that's how we feel. She sleeps very little during the day; she mostly wants to play, or to cuddle in my arms. She's also loving the daily massages I am learning at the Baby massage classes.

Life is sweet.

one hand and no time

Emily is growing fast. Too fast for my taste. She's already wearing clothes for 3 months old when she's not even 2 months, and is heavier on my poor back by the day. She's more beautiful and awake every single day. Her smiles are becoming more and more frequent. She still has her colics, but they have improved thanks to homeopathy, microtherapy, and osteopathy, meaning they thankfully don't last as long.

We've had many visits since her birth - my father, my brother, my mother twice, my grand-mother Yaya, without even mentioning the frequent visits of the locals. I am still expecting a few people though.

As for I, I only have one hand these days, the other one holding Emily in my arms (as I believe in the missing fourth trimester as they call it), and no spare time which explains why my last post was already one month ago.